Today was one of "those" days-still not quite over my bout with bronchitis and the effect of strong antibiotics left me hung over with a blue kind of feeling. The sun was shining, it was a perfect day but the only thing that gave me heart was that I was at least up to my morning cleaning routine which was a major sign that indeed I was getting better!
Still I felt out of sync with myself and my surroundings. I have had some unpleasantness the last several weeks. I am hypoglycemic and on occasion prone to weird acute attacks of low glucose drops that seem incapable of stabilizing. I went through this for several weeks and all my activities simply stopped as I fought waking myself up from horrible stupors and in general feeling dizzy, weak and tired when I was awake. My routines of getting up early, cleaning, romping with the dogs, doing stalls and riding my horse suddenly stopped. Then I contracted bronchitis which sidelined me even longer. Between cabin fever and a sudden decrease in what are usually physically active days frankly just got to me. And today, I felt as if the magic around me was simply gone. I didn't even have the desire to jump start myself.
Usually I ride my mare in the mornings but today at about 2pm I decided that since I was feeling better a nice bareback in the woods might make me feel better. I went out to the field and asked Sassy if she wanted to go out. She lifted her head and perked up her ears. She waited as I approached with her bridle.
Sassy has a story of her own. She is twenty eight and I got her when she was four years old and totally, as we call them, green broke. In other words she was just this side of wild! It took time but ultimately I worked with her and we became great partners and friends. In recent years she had some really serious health problems. She had bouts of pneumonia, went blind in one eye, got Lyme disease which affected her immune system, had become horribly epileptic, foundered (a horrible acute crippling ailment) and was lame from arthritis in her knees. Some years back I called in a vet to put her down and thankfully this old timer said "not today." She began to come back but I retired her.
This last year I decided to begin walking her as she was not really active in the pasture anymore and as we walked, over time, her gait got faster and strong. Out of retirement, I decided and since she had not had a seizure for a long time I decided it was worth the risk of riding her. Of course she cannot trot and run like she used to in her day but to just be able to ride her through the woods, which she always enjoyed is a miracle to me.
Now don't think that because she is a senior citizen with some leg problems that she hasn't given me flack and "argued" with me on the rides at times. I have to admit I just love it when she is cranky enough to speak her mind. So, today, wondering if I were well enough to keep my balance on her bareback I decided we both needed to see the woods. The ride could not have been more perfect. I talked to her and cooed her the whole time and she decided it was nice being out and did not debate what turns to take when as she sometimes does.
After a bit we came back and we both felt happier. My funk of the morning had lifted and I realized that when I decided to ride her today, I touched magic. She was my magic. In everyday life we can never know where the magic comes from....
Of Course Allie learns all about everyday magic in my book, Her Godmother-
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Monday, August 18, 2008
The Magic I couldn't Feel today
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